Joy of Life

Fan Xian’s head ached as a pair of warm, sensuous hands began rubbing his temples. A feeling of fear and uncertainty had washed over him. His eyes remained closed and he blurted out, “Where am I?”

Perhaps because he had drunk too much, he noticed that his voice had become rough and coarse. As the delicate fingers continued to rub his temples, he suddenly felt one depart. Shortly after, a cup was slowly raised to his lips; a cup to which he helplessly drank from. The concoction that he tasted was a benevolent, perfectly measured mixture of honey and hot water – it was the consummate remedy for the battle that was a hangover. As the succulent nectar passed his lips, Fan Xian smiled.

Fan Xian believed that Haitang would not poison him, for there would be no clear benefit for her doing so. As the thought of this crossed his mind, his nose perked to the sensation of a new and intoxicating fragrance; one that embodied elegance and grace. The mere scent made Fan Xian’s heart pound. He then began to feel a certain heat arise from the space below his waist, which drove his mind into a lustful frenzy.

That wonderful fragrance drew closer and closer and as it did, the sudden warmth of a soft and voluptuous body leant against Fan Xian’s head from behind. His heart began to pound at an even greater pace, and it was as if the fire of his heart was stoked into an uncontrollable blaze.

Fan Xian forced his eyes open. An unshakable desire had taken a hold of him, as he witnessed the pale hands of a recognizable figure clothed in white outstretched towards him. “Lili?”

Si Lili turned around and felt her body crumble, and so she fell upon Fan Xian`s chest. As she stared at Fan Xian, her eyes bore credulous innocence and a faint glimmer of sadness. It was if she was in anticipation of something that had yet to occur.

Fan Xian continued to inhale the sweet fragrance of the woman in his arms, but he could not help but feel his mind being led astray. Ever since he had arrived in Shangjing, he had only met her a brief few times in the temple and he had decided long ago to avoid the establishment of an association of any particular magnitude with her. But right now, there she was, fawning for him once again. This delicate and all-too-familiar touch continued to press against his chest.

A moment ago, he was drinking merrily with Haitang and now he was getting affectionate with Si Lili.

Fan Xian quickly understood what was happening here, but he could not figure out why the world was changing as fast as it was.

In the early summer of the capital, Shangjing, if there was no wind, the days would be hot and sultry. If there was no rain, the dust would arise and cloak the area. It was not the most ideal weather. Fortunately, it was already late when the events transpired and a gentle breeze graced the air, cooling the grounds of the temple. Fallen twigs and leaves dressed the roof of this abode, and all was illuminated by the gaze of the sparkling moon, which appeared larger than usual on this particular night.

Fan Xian hastily tightened his pants and took leave of the temple, with a silhouette not unlike a thief running through the night. His face wore a ridiculous expression. Just beyond the entrance of the temple, Fan Xian looked back and saw the sight of a woman who was perched upon the roof, with the moon lit up at her back as if it were a halo. Fan Xian yelled, “You and your mentor are exactly the same! You are both as crazy as each other.”

Fan Xian was always fond of donning the appearance of someone who was sweet, shy and wholly innocent. Even though few believed it, he was kindhearted. But today, he had been thrust into this bizarre scenario, which flustered his mind and made him incredibly angry, but frightened too. To bark at the woman in this manner was a way of venting his frustrations.

Haitang’s vigil watch, up there on the roof of the temple, portrayed her as a figure of mystique; a guardian of the lovebirds, so to speak. The kerchief that she ordinarily wore was now tied around her neck, and she looked like some kind of military commander. There was a look of surprise on her face and a glint of awkward amusement in her eyes. She had apparently not expected Fan Xian to awaken so quickly. Mockingly, she said, “That quick?”

Hearing this, Fan Xian was driven into a rage. He exclaimed, “What kind of woman are you?”

Haitang was fast to understand that which had actually transpired and with some shame lowered her head into the palms of her hand, saying, “How could I forget that you were the apprentice of Fei Jie? I should have increased the dosage of the drug I slipped into your beverage.”

The moon quivered and the twigs that had adorned the roof were knocked away when Haitang leapt from the rooftop to the ground below. The grace of her landing did not disturb the dust of the temple ground as she landed near Fan Xian. She smiled and looked back at the temple, opening the doors as she did so. She signaled for Fan Xian to return inside with her.

Outside the temple, it had grown pitch black. The resident frogs of a nearby pond ribbetted in the night, as if the two of them were visiting a temple that was far off in the wild. Fan Xian’s heart writhed in anger and with a fierce look, he demanded, “What the hell did you put in my drink?”

“Aphrodisiac,” Haitang replied, quickly and sincerely, with an expression that suggested the deed she did was of no special concern. “The best that the palace was able to provide.”

“You...” Fan Xian raised his arm, pointing directly at her nose; her nose that was sharper than anyone else’s. The thought to break it crossed his mind. “I am a Commissioner of the Qing Kingdom and she will be a wife of your emperor soon. How dare you attempt this!”

Haitang’s face became cold all of a sudden. “When you drugged me at Wuduhe, that was okay? You mean to say that it was okay for you to do it and not me?”

“Back then, we were enemies. Today we are friends! How could you say that?” Fan Xian immediately dropped his facade of righteousness.

Haitang smiled and said, “When we were back at the palace, what was it that you said to me?”

Many days ago in the palace...

“The antidote for the aphrodisiac you gave me last time required orange peel. It was too concentrated and thus tasted far too bitter.” Lady Haitang spoke as she stood there drenched in sunlight.

Fan Xian laughed and was aware that Haitang had gotten over the horrendous deception he had committed upon her and he said lightly, “I am the Overwatch Council’s Commissioner, not some noble person with profound honor. These things happen. Do not mind me using such methods. If you actually do mind, then you are free to also use that... aphrodisiac on me.”

These words were frivolous and devoid of earnestness, but Haitang was not a woman who would shrivel up and become ashamed for what had transpired and been done to her, so she said, “If there ever comes a chance, I will use it.”

If there ever comes a chance, I will use it.

Fan Xian had an incredible memory, and so it was of no surprise that he remembered this clearly. He was merely surprised that she was a woman, and had the courage to do something like this. He gasped, and the anger in his heart would not quell, partly because he knew that there was nothing he could do about it. He had inadvertently allowed someone else to drug him, and that person was merely doing that which he had proposed. There really was nothing he could do about it. Fan Xian looked up to the moon, telling himself how much he now hated Haitang.

“I am no ascetic woman. I am just a woman who harbors bitter resentment and a personal grudge.” Haitang laughed.

“It shouldn’t have been Si Lili. She is like a sister to you!” Fan Xian looked at Haitang coldly and continued, “Do you know what this means?”

“Lili likes you.” Haitang smiled and said, “You are not objecting her appearance, are you? A few of use girls thought this would work out well.” Ever since she knew that Fan Xian was the author of Story of the Stone, which was written under the pseudonym Mister Cao, Haitang was even more confident about her plan.

Fan Xian became quiet all of a sudden, lost in deep contemplation. After a while, he looked at Haitang and said, “Actually, since you are the one who drugged me, and even though you yourself are not that pretty, I can face the music. I can give myself away for a brief time. Why bring Lady Si into this?”

Even though Haitang was free and easy, and not the sort to take things to heart, she was just a young woman. When she heard what Fan Xian had to say, she was furious. Her big, bright eyes peered at Fan Xian like razorblades. Her appearance right now was not unlike a wolf, roaming the moors at midnight.

After Fan Xian made his awful speech, he calmed down at the sight of Haitang. To try and ease the situation, he forced a smile and said, “I can just leave, but be wary of your mentor Ku He. He may punish you for your actions on this night.”

Haitang took a deep breath in an attempt to suppress her bubbling, increasingly volatile emotions, and in a low voice spoke, “Please forgive me for setting you up today.”

With an expressionless face, Fan Xian replied, “You could always do this again another time. There will be plenty of other men willing to accept a lustful romp; well, as long as it’s not with you.

Haitang was no longer angry and had little regard for Fan Xian’s snide and spiteful remarks. She lightly said, “The day after tomorrow, the palace will have a banquet. There will be fighting, so please prepare for it.”

“After the banquet, I will be returning to Qing.” Fan Xian observed Haitang’s now strangely serene face. “I cannot stay in Shangjing any longer, for I have an emergency within my family I have to deal with. Can you go arrange for Lady Si to meet with me once again?”

Haitang agreed in silence and then watched Fan Xian’s shadow become one with the dark of the night. As Fan Xian walked across the fields, he staggered and almost collapsed wholly. He at first thought it was because of his distraught mind, but looking down, he realized he had not tightened the cord of his robe well enough and that is what caused his stumble.

So the scholar of the generation and the most promising up-and-coming minister’s most embarrassing moment of his life had actually taken place in a temple in a remote corner of Shangjing.

Haitang laughed. Her wide eyes beamed with joy, for no apparent reason.

Fan Xian had at last returned to the envoy. His eyes relayed a sense of peace, a view that would belie the distressing evening he had truly had. The anger that overwhelmed his face had now at last dissipated, too. Living in this world, having to avert and avoid the constant barrage of tricks and traps was no small feat. One had to be a person of flawless composure and not be one to make a single mistake – that is not to mention one’s need to possess the ability of reading others at a whim.

Fan Xian never imagined that Haitang would be capable of committing such treachery. He never thought she could be so reckless in deciding her course of action, either. In a way, he thought it similar to how he was, as Fan Xian enjoyed the thrill of imprudent, daring deeds.

“Only four?” Fan Xian had already taken a shower, but as he sat in his chair, he couldn’t help but believe he could smell that delicate fragrance once again. And much to his surprise, he couldn’t help but think about Lady Si, either. In his heart, he knew he was a callous person, but he closed his eyes and began to think about what possible influence he could have over that woman.

Perhaps what Haitang said was true, but so what?

Yan Bingyun skewed his eyebrows into a frown. He looked upon Fan Xian and thought it was both strange and foolish of him, his superior and chief of the envoy – an envoy which was preparing to depart – to suddenly disappear for a whole day. He grimaced at the thought of all the business matters that had piled up, issues that all required Fan Xian’s presence. A source had previously informed him that Fan Xian had been spotted with Haitang, drinking in merriment at midnight. She wasn’t one to reveal herself to many, he thought. But if that was at midnight, where did he go after? And why did Fan Xian look so peculiar today?

“Yes, four years. Only four women have been brought to the temple in just as many years” Yan Bingyun answered. “The northern Qi Kingdom’s emperor, ever since he was young, has been quite a down-to-earth fellow. Judging from how he has managed this country, you can tell he is a wise lord. Any man with great ambition will not waste much time dealing with romance.”

“And the northern Qi Emperor has yet to produce an heir?” Fan Xian asked, with his eyes closed.

“The emperor is still young, so the palace is in no rush for that just yet.”

“Not in a rush...? Never mind. You go tell Wang Qinian to arrange a meeting at the palace in two days’ time and have a discussion regarding our way back.” Fan Xian then waved his hand, gesturing for Yan Bingyun to leave.

Yan Bingyun looked at Fan Xian with a puzzled expression, knowing that his master possessed numerous secrets he was not willing to divulge. Although Fan Xian was the Commissioner of the Overwatch Council, there was plenty of intelligence he wasn’t prepared to let anybody know about.

For example, that which occurred tonight. And for another example... the northern Qi emperor might be attacked. Fan Xian’s fingers were still a little cold, and it was then that he realized that perhaps his courage was not as great as Haitang’s.

The gate of the main entrance of the palace, which was nestled between the cliffs, slowly opened.. From right outside the gate, they bore witness once again to the beauty of its black canopies gently rustling in the wind, as an incredible waterfall pounded the rocks below and to their side. Fan Xian looked upon the officers of the northern Qi Kingdom and noted that their faces were unfamiliar to him. As he approached the palace, he stared at them with a menacing gaze. Wei Hua and recognizable officers from the Office of the Grand Herald had arrived before them, however, and he made sure to greet them politely. They were then courteously welcomed by the eunuchs into the hall.

Inside, the hall was completely silent. Alongside the tiled path that they walked upon, a serene water stream followed. The water stream itself was almost wholly still, save for the odd ripple that occasionally arose due to the passing of fish.

Empress Dowager and the Emperor were sat upon their thrones, which were perched slightly higher than the rest of the hall. A dozen low tables had been spread about the hall, and they were each occupied by high-level nobles and officers of the kingdom. The ordinary officers would have to remain in the adjacent courtyards to eat. Fan Xian was a commissioner of the southern Qing Kingdom and as such was granted a seat upon the first table on the left. Aside from Gao Da – currently weaponless – who stood behind Fan Xian, only two others from the envoy were eligible for a seat at his side. Their names were Lin Wen and Lin Jing.

Sitting opposite them was the northern Qi Kingdom’s prime minister and the emperor’s very own tutor. Fan Xian looked at the tutor and immediately acknowledged that he was Zhuang Mohan’s most prized student. What struck Fan Xian the most, though, was how young he looked.

After a series of rituals, the birthday feast began. As Fan Xian looked upon her now, Empress Dowager was younger than what would be expected of someone in possession of such a title. Even though she had faint crow’s feet, she would most certainly be regarded as an average-looking middle-aged woman, not some “grandma” that would typically occupy her seat and title.

But Fan Xian recalled something that Xiao En had once told him, and it was that Empress Dowager was a heartless woman. She would issue a death sentence on a whim, with no remorse. As he thought of this, he turned away and suddenly noticed Shang Shanhu sat at the table beside him. It was a shame that when Fan Xian entered the hall, he did not get the chance to see Shang Shanhu make an entrance.

Empress Dowager lifted her wine glass and began her speech. She was soft-spoken and rather quiet, but Fan Xian paid no heed and decided not to listen. He just followed what his adjacent fellows did mindlessly, making sure to bow repeatedly and so on.

It was Empress Dowager’s birthday, so it would naturally be a more grandiose banquet than something that a commoner could afford. The northern Qi Kingdom’s officers and nobles were all flustered in their attempts to find the most valuable gifts they could present to her, and subsequently bring to the palace. One of these remarkable gifts was a dragon, carved entirely out of the jade that was mined from Dong Mountain. There was also an excessively large clock that had been delivered all the way from Dongyi city. There were even twin-tailed ferrets, brought down from the frozen wastes of the north; to which a tall tale was ascribed that only one of these ferrets could exist every thousand years.

She seemed pleased with the gifts she had received, and gave a nod in response to their offerings.

The southern Qing Kingdom’s envoy’s gift had already been delivered to the capital a long time ago. Even though it was absurdly valuable, the gift itself wasn’t in any way noteworthy. Of course Fan Xian wouldn’t really compose another poem for the Empress Dowager comparing her to a celestial fairy who had descended to the mortal realm. That would give her a big head at the expense of Fan Xian losing face; and besides, his calligraphy wasn’t much to look at.

His personal gift was provided in a little bottle. Inside this bottle was a liquid that was amber in color. Aside from that, it looked fairly average and uninspired. When Empress Dowager opened the lid to have a sniff, however, she looked upon Fan Xian with genuine, heartfelt appreciation.

And yet it was merely perfume. The palace treasury had halted its production of this concoction fifteen years ago, but Fan Xian had managed to take one from Qingyu Hall. He had been keeping it to seduce Haitang with.

At the time, he did not know Haitang wasn’t the sort for such items, and, as he well knew now, that she was not often concerned with glamour and elegance. When Fan Xian was in the capital copying down the works of Li Qingzhao that he could recall, and preparing a perfume originally developed in France, he never thought his attempts at reining in Haitang would fail. And to now think that he was the one almost tricked by her.

After Fan Xian bowed before Empress Dowager, he looked up at the Emperor and noticed that even he was smiling toward Fan Xian. He had long held a preconceived prejudice toward the emperor and empress, but seeing what he saw at that very moment, he couldn’t help but feel his heart flutter ever so slightly.